What kind of influence do you have on others?
Each day you bring the
potential to influence other people whether it is positive or negative. Some of
your impact on people may not be visible but one’s influence has power. Power
is defined as the ability or capacity to do something or act in a particular
way. It is highly important that you understand the power of your influence,
for it has the potential to either build up or discourage someone. The minor
aspects such as your facial expressions you portray and the words you utter may
affect the nature of your social life.
As humans we must “Never
underestimate the influence you have on others” Laurie Buchanan. As we have
alluded, influence can be positive and negative.
Positive influence is the
ability to uplift other people, and impact them to do the right things. For
instance, we have a Malawian Professor Gregory Kamwendo, former Dean of the
College of Education at the University of KwaZulu Natal. He was once told by his
mentor that “When you dream, do not dream in black and white. Dream in colours.”
Prof said these words of wisdom by his mentor kept him going to be where he is
today. An African proverb reads “It takes a village to raise a child”. This is
how Africans implement the power of positive influence. The Africans approach life
from a sense of togetherness. We must always assist each other in order to
become the best version of ourselves. We are our brother’s keeper.
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| Professor Gregory Kamwendo |
Negative influence has with
interactions that promote stagnancy, laziness, dishonesty, hate etc. Influence
can also be passed on from generation to generation. A part of us believes that
one of the reasons why the rich have remained rich and the poor have remained
poor is because of the messages the young ones have received from their
parents. The rich parents tell their young ones that the sky is the limit. The
poor parents tell their young ones that their poor quality of life is all life
has to offer. Once someone is negatively influenced, he or she loses focus and
can end up in trouble. Today, we have people who were told that they were
useless, and there would be absolutely nothing which they could do to end their
misery; indeed their minds accumulated that perception about their lives.
Negative influence affects the person in different ways, for example, he or she
could fail to attain the best of him or herself because he was negatively
influenced.
Let us share the story of the
Motaung twins, Thuto and Tsepo. Thuto le Tsepo lost their parents at the age of
six. They were taken to different foster parents. Thuto grew up and became a Medical Doctor whereas Tsepo ended up in jail. It is evident that Thuto had a
positive influence around him which had a good impact in his future. Tsepo had
a negative influence around him which had a negative impact in his future. Perhaps
it is the different environment they grew up under. This story shows the power
of influence. One can argue that a person’s personality is influenced by his
background more than his environment; but again someone is allowed to differ on
that aspect. Everyone has absolute power to determine his or her reality.
A scripture from the Bible
reads ‘As a men thinks, so is he.’ Proverbs 23:7 Dr. John Tibane a speaker and
author once said “Thoughts are like seeds they produce after their own kind”.
We need to pay attention on what we allow our mind to entertain because it has
power to determine who we become or how are we influenced. It also dictates how
we influence other people. Chilling with
pessimists will make you a pessimist. Spending time with optimists will make
you an optimist. Mind your company. “Life becomes easier when you delete the
negative people from it.” Ben Francia. Wisdom is an attribute that makes one to
influence others positively; it will also guide him or her to only entertain
positive influences. Wisdom is the answer.
There are different ways to
positively influence people:
Firstly, choose to see good
in other people, avoid criticizing people. If you have to criticize people go
for what people call constructive criticism. Your comments to other people should
build them up.
Secondly, have manners when addressing
issues or situations. The first thing you say to someone sets the tone of the
conversation. Your approach when resolving conflicts will determine whether a
solution is found or the situation will deteriorate.
We can never talk about
positive influence without mentioning positive thinking. Positive thinking also
has power because it denotes that one must focus on expecting positive outcomes
from life. Yes, it is possible that one may be influenced by somebody but everybody
possesses the ability choose his or her thoughts. It is recommendable that
everybody finds the strength to think positive regardless of the influence
around them.
Your behaviour and how you
treat others today will either open or close doors for you tomorrow. People you
have influenced positively will never forget you. You are in their good books.
People you have influenced negatively do not have any good thing to say about
you. You are in their bad books. Make people to be always looking forward
towards interacting with you. Remember in the end, we only regret the chances
we did not take.
May God’s Grace and light
shine on you!
Writers: S, Mpungose; M,
Xaba & M, Thabana.
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| S. Mpungose |
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| M. Xaba |
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| M. Thabana |
